Borders, Walls and Smokescreens: Part 1
Everybody has borders they want to protect. Nothing wrong with that. We all build walls to protect those borders. That’s normal.
The problem is, most of us claim borders and build walls that are a cover up for the real issues. These smoke screens serve the purpose of helping us feel justified, but aren’t effective in the long run because of the sacrifices they require.
Six Smoke Screens to Justify a Border Wall
They Can’t Think
This smokescreen claims others are stupid, so I have to do the thinking for them. So I build a wall of micromanaging in an attempt to control. In the process I sacrifice efficiency because I waste so much time worrying about what everyone else is doing. The solution: Let go and spend your energy helping others become more capable.
They Are Dangerous
This smokescreen claims others have malicious intent, even if I can’t prove it, so I have to get them before they get me. Better safe than sorry! So I build a wall of self-protection and pre-emptive strikes in an effort to allay my fears. In the process I sacrifice integrity and lose the respect of those I serve because I monger fear. The solution: Build alliances based on mutual respect.
They Are Weak
This smokescreen claims others are incapable of playing with the big-dogs, so I may as well leave them in the dust or squash them. So, I build a wall of narcissism, manipulation and domination in an effort to prove I am better than them. In the process I sacrifice glory because the only reason people comply is because they are intimidated by me. The solution: Build relationships based on interdependence.
Tune in next week for the other three smokescreens.
Copyright Next Element Consulting, LLC 2019
This article was inspired by the groundbreaking personality research by Dr. Taibi Kahler. Each smokescreen is correlated with one of the six Kahler Personality types. Learn about your personality and how be your best self by attending one of our Process Communication Model seminars.