The Anatomy Of Peace: Kindred Spirits

I still remember reading Leadership and Self-Deception: Getting Out of The Box like it was yesterday. The principles in this book from The Arbinger Institute were instrumental in helping form my theory of leadership and approach to conflict. It was a transformative experience ten years ago and still one of the top three leadership books on my list.

The latest Arbinger book I’m reading is The Anatomy of Peace: Resolving The Heart of Conflict. I feel like a kindred spirit with these folks! This book resonates with me at so many levels.

Written as a fable, The Anatomy of Peace is an exploration into the dynamics of how people get “crooked” with one another and end up at war. What is the difference between seeing others as people vs. as objects? How does “way of being” influence our attitude and behavior towards others? What does it mean to betray our inner sense towards others? What self-justifying beliefs keep us “at war” with ourselves and others? Explore these questions and find answers through the experience of the book’s characters, each struggling to find peace within themselves and with people in their lives.

What I liked best about the book is how it focuses on what needs to change inside of me first before anything can change in my relationships with others. It’s so easy to focus on changing others’ behavior without recognizing how our “way of being” towards them can be part of the problem.

This book suggests that conflict doesn’t have to be destructive, and that it’s possible to be soft and strong at the same time. I couldn’t agree more!!

Whether you are in the field of conflict resolution, leadership communication, or just seeking to end a stalemate with someone you love, The Anatomy of Peace is a terrific resource. I highly recommend it!

Copyright 2016, Next Element Consulting, LLC

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