The Best Leaders Stop The Drama, Not The Conflict

Many leaders equate conflict with workplace drama. It’s not surprising since conflict is often expressed through unhealthy behaviors like verbal attacks, avoidance, or passive-aggressive tactics. It’s also not surprising that many leaders would prefer to eliminate conflict to stop the workplace drama.

In our conflict awareness survey, 72% of survey responders said they compromise to avoid conflict. 

Conflict is not the problem – drama is

Here’s the issue. When the conflict is gone, so are many of the foundational characteristics of strong, healthy work cultures like creativity, innovation, mutual struggles that build trust, working through vulnerability, or asking for help. The tension in conflict can be energizing and transformative when managed well.

Conflict is not inherently bad. It is simply the energy created when there is a gap between what we want and what we are experiencing at any point in time. How a leader deals with this energy determines whether conflict results in drama or something different and better.

Leaders who turn conflict into drama:

• Avoid difficult conversations
• Capitulate when pushed
• Shut down when they don’t feel heard
• Use passive-aggressive tactics to get what they want
• Blame others for how they feel
• Manipulate to achieve ulterior motives
• Use threats to get compliance
• Double down on failing strategies

According to DDI’s 2025 Global Leadership Forecast, this year is the first year in the history of their research that trust in immediate managers has fallen below trust in senior leadership. This startling trend is explained, in part, by increasingly tense work environments, which require leaders to master conflict and avoid drama. Trust in leaders has a lot to do with their ability to navigate conflict.

Next Element’s trust and conflict research found that over 50% of employees are not confident in their supervisor’s ability to navigate conflict positively.

Unlock the positive potential in conflict

Conflict has crazy positive potential when used correctly. Leaders can harness the energy of conflict to drive innovation, connection, and performance.

Stewardship of conflict energy requires Compassionate Accountability® –  a commitment to struggling with people through conflict rather than struggling against them to feel justified.

Leaders who turn conflict into positive results:

• Empathize to build an emotional connection
• Validate feelings without condoning bad behavior
• Share their own emotional experiences
• Ask curious questions to learn about others’ perspectives
• Look for synergy
• Point out strengths
• Adjust to new information
• Clarify their boundaries without attack or blame
• Ask for new behaviors without threats
• Own up to their own mistakes

Stewardship of conflict energy is one of the most critical leadership competencies. It makes the difference between toxic cultures of drama, and productive cultures of trust, innovation, and performance.

Copyright Next Element Consulting, LLC 2025